News Flash! This New U.S. Citizen will not be voting.

Ladies and Gentlemen, meet one of the newest U.S. Citizens of the United States. That would be *moi*. Yes, after residing in this country as a permanent resident since 1983, I finally did it. My first plight as a dutiful denizen? Registering to vote. I know there are those of you out there that are now rolling your eyes saying now how could my vote possibly make a difference? Now imagine my retort: What if all of the people that had that attitude actually voted?

So being ready to fulfill my newly appointed duty and right as a full-fledged citizen of the good ol' U S of A, I try to find out what's going on with all of the signs going up around town for the local elections. Try it some time, you might be surprised how difficult it is to find out whom you should vote for (yes, I actually want to know what these characters' views are before I mark my box), where to go to vote and such. A little hand holding for this newby voter would be nice, thank you very much. So many websites have broken links and outdated information its maddening. No, I'm not interested in knowing who was running for sheriff in 1996!!

Which brings us to today. I feel like a deflated balloon. Here I was all ready to strut my stuff into the nearest polling booth...But guess what? I missed the cut off by 4 days! That's right...4 days. And, if I would have been able to vote in this election, I would have taken pictures of this momentous occassion.

So I'm rallying the troups! Please do me a favor? Exercise your God-given American right. Get off your duff, and get out there and vote. But wait! Before you do, please, please please go as an educated voter. Make me proud and make sure you understand what the candidates are going to do for you and whether their stance on issues are in line with your beliefs.

Now get busy! Because after it's all over and the votes are counting, I'm not going to listen to you whine and complain about who got elected, unless you got your petoot out there and voted. Me, on the other hand, I have an excuse. But you get bet your sweet bippy I'll be ready for the next election. It's on America, I have arrived!

For you lazy bones who aren't registered to vote, get going.

If you really want to know something scary -- try this for sport...

For shame! The United States ranks 139th in voter turn out!!!